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The necessity of meetings
Retreats and First Saturday meetings, or local prayer group meetings are an absolute necessity for family members who sincerely desire to help their son or daughter during his time in Community, as well as when he exits Community at the appointed time. The progress that an individual makes in Community is significantly affected by the family's involvement. In America, the retreat weekends are given by the director of Comunita Cenacolo America and other members of Cenacolo. Only through attendance at these events can the family understand the ways the Community challenges, encourages, confronts, and heals. The family will begin to see how their son or daughter is living and who their son or daughter is becoming during his time in Cenacolo. Also, it is necessary for the family to learn about the struggles he may experience during his time within the Community and when he exits. The family must learn the difference between "help" that aids in their son's change and growth vs. perceived "help" that, in reality, is harmful to genuine change and development. Without attending the retreat weekends it is impossible to develop an understanding of this.
If the family does not enter into the life of the Community themselves, the family will be a hindrance, not a help, when the young man exits. The family will have one of two reactions: a pessimistic belief that he is the same "old loser" or an unrealistic idealization of the "new son." The family will not know who he is because they will only remember the drug addict, the liar, the manipulator, the thief, the user, and the exploiter. Their son will be a stranger, and they will relate and react in old ways that can be damaging. Conversely, the idealization of the son results in choices by the family that place the young man in situations which are dangerous for the particular vulnerabilities of addicts. Family action that helps a non-addict can be very harmful to an addict. It is an absolute necessity for families to learn what to do and what not to do.
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